Male bonds develop one way while female friendships develop another.

Anthropologist Thomas Yarrow’s four-year study of volunteers at a heritage steam railway found men often build close ties through shared activities and companionable silence, and the article argues those reticent friendships can still show care.

Men are often encouraged to open up emotionally, yet many prefer companionship built around shared activities rather than intimate talk. The article discusses concerns about male loneliness, reports that more than a quarter of British men say they have no close friends, and notes that male suicide rates are higher than female ones. Anthropologist Thomas Yarrow spent four years observing volunteers at a heritage steam railway and concluded that friendships based on doing things together and companionable silence can be close. The author suggests those quieter friendships can convey care without direct verbal expression. Key points: - The piece notes common public messages that men should 'talk more' and highlights persistent worries about male loneliness and health. - Thomas Yarrow, a Durham anthropologist, observed mostly older volunteers at a heritage steam railway for four years and wrote a study titled "Rethinking male relationships and the value of personal reticence." - Yarrow’s account describes friendships centred on shared hobbies and companionable silence rather than explicit emotional disclosure. - An example from the study describes volunteers noticing when a member was absent or unwell and responding with cups of tea, jokes and discreet support rather than direct questioning. - The author adds that younger men are often more open about feelings, and that older men can also express emotion through topics like politics or sport. Summary: The article suggests we may need to reconsider assumptions about what counts as intimacy, noting that activity-based, reticent male friendships can still provide practical care and emotional support. Undetermined at this time.