Feeling that you matter helps people thrive.

Jennifer Breheny Wallace writes in her book 'Mattering' that feeling like you matter is a basic human need tied to well‑being, and the interview cites research suggesting even an hour a week with supportive people can boost resilience.

Jennifer Breheny Wallace argues in her book 'Mattering: The Secret to a Life of Deep Connection and Purpose' that the secret to thriving is feeling like you matter to other people. The article notes that it can be tempting to withdraw, especially in darker months, but that social connection matters for health and well‑being. Wallace says researchers view mattering as a fundamental human need after food and shelter and identify five components that contribute to that feeling. The piece is based on an interview in which Wallace discusses how friendships, mutual support and small acts of help sustain a sense of importance and purpose. Key findings: - Mattering is described as a fundamental human need after food and shelter, and researchers find it shapes behavior. - The article reports that when people feel they do not matter, they may withdraw or turn to substances or self‑harm, or act out in ways such as incivility or aggression. - Researchers identify five components of mattering, though the article does not list them in full. - The interview highlights that many everyday supports have become paid services, which can reduce mutual reliance and the social proof that we matter. - The article cites Mayo Clinic research saying even about an hour a week with people who make us feel seen and understood can bolster resilience. - Wallace notes that small acts of support can increase energy because human energy can sometimes operate like a muscle rather than a fixed bank account. Summary: Meeting the need to feel like one matters is linked to better mental health and resilience, while long‑term lack of that feeling is associated with withdrawal and harmful behaviors. Wallace's book and the interview emphasize friendships, reciprocal support and small acts of help as factors that reinforce mattering, and they point to cultural trends that can weaken mutual reliance. Undetermined at this time.